Thoughts on Tonights LA Galaxy-FC Dallas ESPN Game


Just got back from running at the gym and thought I would grace everyone in the computer lab with the smell of my balls. So when reading this article imagine smell lines coming off the page.

Tonight is the opening game of ESPN contractually obligated MLS ESPN Primetime Thursday; a.k.a. when does Beckham start playing? I'm not going to watch it as I will be drunk somewhere within the city limits of Pittsburgh. Let's root for a repeat of last week where Dave and me walked from Southside back to Oakland, in about 10 minutes (in drunken time, of course). Watching your ex-girlfriend making out with some dude at the bar is a mother fucker. Enough of my horrible personal problems and onto what you came for, half-assed MLS coverage.

Random thoughts I am having while staring at that picture of Landon Donovan:

1. Nate Jaqua is the key to the LA strike force. Coming over in a trade from Toronto who got him in a trade from Chicago. Jaqua is a textbook target man he towers over most of the defenses in the MLS and is a great header of the ball. FC Dallas has probably the worst defense in the MLS so look for him to nick a goal off a set piece.

2. Kenny Cooper and Carlos Ruiz might be the best strike force in the MLS, problem is they won't be getting service from the midfield.

3. On the other hand, Chris Albright is going to need to play a solid game controlling the flanks and keeping the ball out of the air. Dallas is going to try to hit Cooper with balls in the air to knock down for Ruiz.

4. Look for Santino Quaranta to factor in the game despite having pre-season fitness problems. One of the better wide players in the US domestic pool.

5. Landycakes needs to continue his strong play this year. Maybe, getting married actually did mature him and turn him into a leader. Wonder what would happen if I got married? Could I actually graduate college at some point in my life, hmmm? Guess we will never know.

6. Enjoy the skillful goalkeeping of Trinadad and Tobago star Shaka Hislop for FC Dallas. Everytime I see him play I think of that song that Freshman and Brendan played for me about the T and T World Cup team. WE ARE THE SOCA WARRIORS.

If you are staying at home tonight not destroying your liver enjoy the game. I will watch it sometime tommorrow off of MLSnet.

She's an easy lover

4 Responses to “Thoughts on Tonights LA Galaxy-FC Dallas ESPN Game”

  1. # Blogger Freshman

    Where the Christ did you get that picture? I've never been so creeped out in my life. That's way worse than seeing Jeff Reed's balls.  

  2. # Blogger Jason Cramer

    Google images, I was looking for the gayest picture of Landon I could find and bam. He is such a strong leader. Look at the way he is looking at you in the camera. His eyes they are talking to you, revealing secrets of the world. I just get lost in those beautiful eyes. With his bulging muscles, the body of a god I tell you.

    Shit I need to get laid, I'm starting to write romance novels about soccer players.  

  3. # Blogger Melby

    the easy lover link is broken.

    as is my heart.  

  4. # Blogger Jason Cramer

    Still working for me but I will warn you its not the beautiful version thats on my dvr. This is original video not the live one.

    I hate the internet because I don't understand it.  

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