The Halloween Mix Bodhisattva

First off, I know exactly what the hell the title means. This fucking mix could have transcended to a realm of pure energy years ago, but it chose to remain among the scum and filth of this world to show you the way.

Before you get to see the mix, a brief word about how you've been fucking up your Halloween mix all these years.

First of all, Halloween is not actually about Satan, devils monsters and such. No one celebrates Halloween to legitimately be scared. Kids do it to dress up like their favorite cartoon characters and pass out in a puddle of chocolate vomit at the end of the night. Adults do it to have an excuse to act like immature little kids again, and pass out in a puddle of regular vomit at the end of the night.

Therefore black/death/speed metal does not belong on a Halloween mix. Unless your Halloween party is a bunch of pimply 14-year-olds with aggression problems playing D&D in your parent's rec room, this is totally inappropriate. However, music that puts forth a "spooky" air, but is still fun to listen to, i.e. The Horror, or Fresh Blood is great. It reminds people that they're at a theme party, but they enjoy it, also. Crazy right?

Examples: Tracks 2, 10 and 21. This is after he makes the same argument I just did.

Secondly, if you're the kind of music nerd who's got enough music to make theme mixtapes for parties, it's going to be hard to remember where the "killer" is 'mongst all the "filler". But some of these mixtapes look like the person went to the itunes search bar and just typed "ghost", "Monster" "Vampire" etc in and added whatever got coughed up. "Werewolf" by Cat Power, and "Zombie" by the Cranberries might seem like they'd fit if you don't give two shits about what you're doing. And Christ help you if put Vampire Weekend or some such on there. The only one who sees the Artist Name and Track Title are you. Everyone else just listens to the music. Nothing about the Starlight Mints' Rhino Stomp suggests it'd work in a Halloween mix, but by God, it does.

Example: That last blog, tracks 4, 14, 18. Edgar Winter's Frankenstein? Don't Fear the Reaper? Fucking Donovan?! This is probably the ugliest mess of hipster "obscurity trumps everything" I've ever seen. Like two of these songs work.

Thirdly, and I think I may be the first person in the history of the internet to realize this, but we used to be ten years old. That's why Halloween is awesome, regressing to that time. And what thought consumed our every waking minute all the way through October? Fucking candy is what! What kind of goth nerd gets so wrapped up in the fake spiderwebs and construction paper bats that he puts Black Sabbath on a Halloween mix and neglects "Candyman", "Sugar High" "I Want Candy" et al.?

Fourth: the Monster Mash. It is just horrible. It's obvious, it's not a fun song it's not good music and you can't even listen ironically to it since it gets played every year at every party like clockwork. "The Blob" however, is awesome.

Fifth: Even if the song is awesome, and it's got a cool title and all, if it doesn't fit or flow, it's out. Fela Kuti's Zombie is awesome and fits, but at 12 plus minutes, it'll be bringing up the rear or departing. Sex and Candy is almost too on the nose, but it's slow and not really superfun. It's on probation. Gorillaz "November Has Come" is a cute little bit of themework, but I couldn't get it to fit so out it goes. Gotta be flexible.

Sixth: Like every Mix on the internet seems to be broken up into one or more groups of like 10-15 songs. This isn't 2003, you don't have to burn this shit to a cd. It can be as long as you like, and since your party will hopefully be going for more than an hour or two it just makes sense to make it super long.

Here they are, in no particular order. A mix three times as long, ten times as fun, with more angles to it than your average unimaginative haunted house album that tends to get made. You're welcome. I'll probably be adding and subtracting all the way up to the 31st so if you've got a suggestion let's hear it.

Michael Jackson: Thriller, obviously
The Hives: Abracadaver
Oingo Boingo: Dead Man's Party
Genesis: Justice
Do The Know It's Hallowee'n: The North American Halloween Prevention Initiative
The Horror: RJD2
Wolf Like Me: TV on the Radio
Awoo: Hidden Cameras
Date With The Night: Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Engwish Bwudd: Man Man
Scarecrow: Martin Rebelski
Howlin' For You: Black Keys
Satan Said Dance: Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
God Bless The Dead: 2Pac
Heads Will Roll (Dance till You're Dead): Yeah Yeah Yeahs
The Return of Evil Bill: Clinic
Zombie: Fela Kuti
Halloween: Aqua
Rhino Stomp: Starlight Mints
Boogie Monster: Gnarls Barkely
Curse of Millhaven: Nick Cave/Bad Seeds
Dig, Lazarus, Dig!: Nick Cave/Bad Seeds
Candy for Everyone: The Late B.P. Helium
Fresh Blood: Eels
Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps): David Bowie
Eyes of the Night: Starlight Mints
All Alone: Gorillaz
Chase The Devil: Eagles of Death Metal
Voodoo Lady: Ween
Lollipop (Candyman): Aqua
The Blue Wrath: I-Monster
Nightmares: Clipse
Chocolate Pope: Electric Six
Ghost Town: The Specials
The Mask: Danger Doom
The Blob: The Five Blobs
M1 A1: Gorillaz
Dracula's Wedding: Outkast
Sugar High: Coyote Shivers
Werewolf Bar Mitzvah: Tracey Jordan
Sex and Candy: Marcy Playground
Goodbye Horses: Q Lazarus
Pretend We're Dead: L7
Ghostbusters Theme: Ray Parker Jr.
A Nightmare on My Street: DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince:
Tootsee Roll: 69 Boyz
The Robots: Teddybears
The Boy Least Likely To is a Machine: The Boy Least Likely To
Mr. Vampire: Torches
Monster: Kanye West
Posed to Death: The Faint
Paranoiaattack: The Faint

Suggested by Brendan:
Skulls: Misfits
Halloween: Mudhoney

Consider the game elevated.



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